Coaches......you can print this out and hand to parents at your first team
meeting
The role that parents play in the life of a soccer player has a tremendous
impact on their experience. With this in mind, we have taken some time to write
down some helpful reminders for all of us as we approach the upcoming season.
If you should have any questions about these thoughts, please feel free to
discuss it with us, the coaches.
- Let the coaches coach:
Leave the coaching to the coaches. This includes motivating, psyching your
child for practice, after game critiquing, setting goals, requiring
additional training, etc. You have entrusted the care of your player to
these coaches and they need to be free to do their job. If a player has
too many coaches, it is confusing for him and his performance usually
declines.
- Support the program:
Get involved. Volunteer. Help out with fundraisers, car-pool; anything to
support the program.
- Be you child's best fan:
Support your child unconditionally. Do not withdraw love when your child
performs poorly. Your child should never have to perform to win
your love.
- Support and root for all
players on the team: Foster teamwork. Your child's teammates are
not the enemy. When they are playing better than your child, your
child now has a wonderful opportunity to learn.
- Do not bribe or offer
incentives: Your job is not to motivate. Leave this to the
coaching staff. Bribes will distract your child from properly
concentrating in practice and game situations.
- Encourage your child to
talk with the coaches: If your child is having difficulties in
practice or games, or can't make a practice, etc., encourage them
to speak directly to the coaches. This "responsibility taking"
is a big part of becoming a big-time player. By handling the off-field
tasks, your child is claiming ownership of all aspects of the game -
preparation for as well as playing the game.
- Understand and display
appropriate game behavior: Remember, your child's self esteem and
game performance is at stake. Be supportive, cheer, be appropriate. To
perform to the best of his abilities, a player needs to focus on the parts
of the game that they can control (his fitness, positioning, decision
making, skill, aggressiveness, what the game is presenting them). If he
starts focusing on what he can not control (the condition of the field,
the referee, the weather, the opponent, even the outcome of the game at
times), he will not play up to his ability. If he hears a lot of people
telling him what to do, or yelling at the referee, it diverts his
attention away from the task at hand.
- Monitor your child's
stress level at home: Keep an eye on the player to make sure that they
are handling stress efeectively from the various activities in his life.
- Monitor eating and sleeping
habits: Be sure your child is eating the proper foods and getting
adequate rest.
- Help your child keep his
priorities straight: Help your child maintain a focus on schoolwork,
relationships and the other things in life beside soccer. Also, if your child
has made a commitment to soccer, help him fulfill his obligation to the
team.
- Reality test: If your
child has come off the field when his team has lost, but he has played his
best, help him to see this as a "win". Remind him that he is to
focus on "process" and not "results". His fun and
satisfaction should be derived from "striving to win".
Conversely, he should be as satisfied from success that occurs despite
inadequate preparation and performance.
- Keep soccer in its proper
perspective: Soccer should not be larger than life for you. If your
child's performance produces strong emotions in you, suppress them.
Remember your relationship will continue with your children long after
their competitive soccer days are over. Keep your goals and needs
separate from your child's experience.
- Have fun: That is what
we will be trying to do! We will try to challenge your child to reach past
their "comfort level" and improve themselves as a player,
and thus, a person. We will attempt to do this in environments that are
fun, yet challenging. We look forward to this process. We hope you do to!